Timing is Everything
This week Hayley talks us through her experience with Mr Right at the the wrong time…
‘It’s not you, it’s me.’
‘Right person, wrong time.’
Is this all baloney? Actually I think whoever thought this up maybe onto something…
So anyway, his name was Raj; tall, handsome with an excellent job. We spoke for hours and for once it looked like a good old-fashioned romance was blooming for me and my paramour. He lived in London (au revoir long distance), had been single for months and well and truly over his ex and – yes – he had ginormous feet.
Date numero uno consisted of picking me up outside my local cinema. Being Britain naturally it was raining but Prince Charming had an umbrella which we snuggled underneath on the way to the Mexican cantina. After two courses and a couple of virgin cocktails, he offered to drive me home. Of course it would have been uncouth to refuse and so we were en route to my place not without taking the scenic route via the park.
Picture the scene: dewy grass, the earthy aroma of wet soil and a gorgeous man within smooching distance. We made-out like a couple of hormonal teens and I enjoyed every moment of it. He dropped me home not a minute too soon. As you can imagine, I was grinning all day long.
Then the bombshell dropped.
Unbeknownst to me his grandmother had been ill for some time and had sadly passed away days after our fairy-tale date. It was a terrible blow and I awkwardly tried to console him, but how far do you venture into someone’s grief being a relatively new romance? I had known him enough to want to help but we weren’t dating…I wasn’t his girlfriend…we weren’t anything!
I tried my best but despite my efforts he became understandably withdrawn. Then one night I got a Whatsapp message.
Him: I don’t want to waste your time but I don’t think I’m ready for us right now. I’m not in a good place and it’s not fair to you. Sorry.
Well that was essentially the message; him spewing his feelings and me receiving them. I’ll be honest I was sad, gutted, frustrated and however selfish that sounds they were authentic feelings. There was some back and forth and even an unexpected tryst later that month but in the end I resolved that he did the adult thing of withdrawing before either of us got hurt.
So ladies, you may have found the smartest/sexiest/well-mannered (insert favourite adjective) man alive but if the timing is not right for you or him, well that’s how the cookie crumbles. Most make or break situations rely on a myriad of factors but I’m afraid that a big issue will always be timing.
Sometimes things happen which you don’t have any control of and in those circumstances you just have to be a grown-up and accept that it wasn’t meant to be. So take heed; he may be Mr Right but make sure he is Mr Right-time-right-place.