Positive Dating: Letting Go Of The Past
It can be easy to carry the baggage from past relationships with you into new ones, but it tends to have a negative effect. We’ve come up with a guide on how to make sure that you go into a potential new partnership with an open mind and a positive attitude!
Working on you: If you have had a tough time in the past and had a bad time in love, it can really take its toll on your self-confidence, your dating confidence and your willingness to trust again. It’s so easy to build walls around yourself which can really shut you off from future possibilities.
Try to remember that everyone is different and your perfect match could be just around the corner. More importantly, they could actually be worthy of your attention and love. You have to tell yourself and believe that you are perfect the way you are and that not everyone will cause you pain. Putting yourself in the right mindset before dating is a must!
It starts with your profile: Avoid mentioning exes and any statements that may come across as aggressive or confrontational. Things like “My ex was a cheat, so if you are one, I’m not interested” can actually drive away a lot of matches that aren’t of that disposition. It creates a concern for the reader that your fears could negatively affect a new relationship.
Instead state that you are looking for honesty, transparency or loyalty in a new partner. Keep it light and happy, and your matches could be queuing up before you know it. A general, positive outlook on life is a very desirable trait when it comes to online dating.
Messaging: Less personal information is more, to begin with. Keep the conversation light and if questions are raised about past partners, explain the situation but try to keep it brief and positive. After all, if it didn’t work out, they obviously weren’t the one for you, and this new match could be!
You want to show off your lust for life and openness for future opportunities so always reread your messages before sending an imagine what you would think if you received it.
Trusting someone new: If it all goes well with a new date and things get a little more serious, you still have to maintain an unbiased view of them, and not judge them based on your previous partner’s actions.
Always try to be open and communicate your fears rather than bottling it up or being confrontational. Communicating in this way will make a very solid foundation for a long and happy romance!
Until next time!
The Just Singles Team